( bell ringing )
Curse this cursed, ghostly fog.
l can barely see past me own nose.
Argh.
( screams )
( grunting )
( groans )
Me ship.
( dialing phone )
Hello, roadside assistance?
I've got a bit of a flat!
My location where I'll be staying?
GHOST: Business or residence?
Residence.
Argh!
The Flying Dutchman!
Wh-Wh-What are you doing in my house?
I'm stuck here while me ship is being repaired.
Till then, I'm here to haunt ya!
( laughs maniacally )
( screams )
Squidward! Squidward!
Squidward, help!
Ooh! Ow! Ow! Ooh!
Ow! Oh! Ee! Ee! Ow! Ooh!
Squidward, you have to help me!
There's a gh-gh-gh, a ghost in my house!
SpongeBob, how many times do I have to tell you,
I don't believe in ghosts, and I never liked you?
Patrick!
Patrick! Patrick! Patrick!
Patrick, you've got to help me!
The Flying Dutch...
man.
( Gary crying )
Gary!
( gasps )
Don't you dare hurt my little Gary!
Aw, I just wanted to pet the little guy.
There, there, Dutchie's not gonna hurt you.
I love me a good snail.
( screams )
( meow )
Gary!
( Dutchman laughs maniacally )
Nothing better than giving a good scare!
Argh!
( laughing )
It's okay, Gary.
Don't get too comfortable!
Good night, Gary.
( screams )
( laughs )
( screams )
( laughs )
( laughs nervously )
( sighs )
Hmm?
( sighs )
( laughing evilly )
( screams )
Hmm?
Um, Dutchie, is this gonna be much longer?
Why aren't you freaking out, lad?
Well, you've been here a while,
and, uh, I've seen all your tricks.
What are you trying to say?
Eh.
I know when I'm washed up.
l've been doing the same material for years.
Scaring is a young man's game.
It's time to give up the ghost.
No pun intended.
Oh, no, no.
l meant that I'm just used to it, that's all.
Don't lie to me.
You've just got to scare
someone other than me.
Hmm...
Mind if I test it out?
Yeah, this does feel comfortable.
( bell rings )
Could you excuse me a moment?
( snoring )
( growls )
( mutters )
Grr!
Rah! Rah!
Boo! Rah!
Ah, forget it.
So, what do you think?
( screams )
( growls )
It's official.
I'm not scary anymore.
Just what kind of talk is that?
You're just off your game, that's all.
Maybe I just need a break.
Take some time off, you know?
Sure, relax a little.
Maybe stay with a friend for a while.
On a comfy couch in a pineapple.
Just for a little while longer?
Till I get back on me feet?
( glass breaking )
Hey, champ, how's it... ( screams )
Turn it up! Turn the knob up!
Whoo!
Who'd guess we have so much in common?
You like teddy bears; I like teddy bears.
You like ponies; I like ponies.
Is that a wedding ring?
Oh, this? Oh, it's nothing.
( laughs )
What is going on around here?!
Come on, SpongeBob, don't be a stick in the mud.
Look out below!
( laughs )
( screams )
How was that?
Even better the third time.
Oh, no.
No, no, no, no, no!
Everyone, get out!
All righty, boys, party's over.
Time to scoot, honey.
( burping )
Dutchie, do you want to spend eternity on this couch?
Well, it is comfy.
Look in the mirror.
You're a ghost of your former self.
Ah, you're right, SpongeBob.
I'm pathetic.
Yes, you are.
But we're going to raise you up from your squalid condition
through the use of visual aids.
Watch now.
What in barnacles is it?
A journey into self-awareness.
( screams )
The power within. The power within.
( whispering ): The power within.
The power within.
( echoing ): The power within.
The power within!
Yeah!
( sobbing )
That was beautiful.
Now get off of that couch and into your clothes, Dutchman.
It's time to get serious.
Let's start you off easy.
You think you can take that old lady down there?
What, are you kidding me?
Scaring her is too easy.
Now, that's the Flying Dutchman I know.
Let's see you put those words into action.
No problemo, compadre.
( thunder )
( Dutchman screaming )
Yargh!
Lonnie, is that you?
What? No!
'Tis I, the ominous Flying Dutchman!
( screams )
Lonnie, there's this great new product called toothpaste.
I think you should try it.
Let's hit it!
( straining )
( laughs )
Dude, look at your pecs.
You're phenomenal.
Truly a hard body.
Look at those guns.
( screams )
( gasps )
( chuckles ) Now he's got him.
My latissimus dorsi has gone flabby.
l've got to get to a rowing machine.
Ah.
It's no use, SpongeBob.
I can't seem to scare anyone.
Maybe people just don't believe in ghosts anymore.
Wait a minute!
l think you just gave me the answer to all your problems.
( whispering )
...goblins... ( whispering )
...guilt trip... ( whispering )
( humming )
Huh?
Squidward! Squidward!
What's going on?
Why haven't you called me?
Mother?
Why haven't you called your mother?
( screams )
Uh, Squiddums loves his mama.
Why don't you call me then?
Why don't you call me? Why don't you call me?
( clarinet playing raucously )
I heard you don't believe in ghosts!
Ghosts?
As in the Flying Dutchman!
( laughs maniacally )
( screaming )
There's no such thing as ghosts.
No such things.
No such thing as ghosts?
No such thing as ghosts?!
You don't believe in ghosts?!
( heavy breathing )
SpongeBob?
( laughs maniacally )
Ooh.
Scary.
No!
That's impossible!
Ghosts! Ghosts!
Dutchie, it worked!
You got your scare back.
And me confidence, too.
Now I feel like I could scare
the living criminy out of anybody!
All thanks to you, my boy.
And maybe your ship will be repaired soon.
Actually, I have a confession, SpongeBob.
My ship's been done for three months now.
Well, it was nice rooming with ya.
( bell ringing )
Oh, yeah, I almost forgot.
l left you a little something something for all your trouble.
Now it's high time for me to ruin more souls.
( laughs maniacally )
( gasps )
( growling )
( SpongeBob laughs )
Good ol' Dutchie. ( burps )